That’s how I describe the days when my kittens leave. A couple of you wondered about how breeders are able to give up kittens when the time comes for them to go to new homes and it’s a question I’ve heard over and over.
At first glance it might seem like we love our kittens a little less than other people love their pets or that we just regard them as a “product”. I hope that anyone who reads this blog would quickly recognize that for the absurdity it is. Each and every kitten in my home is loved and spoiled. I’d happily keep every one of them if sanity didn’t prevail. You see, times like right now when I have a whole houseful of kittens reminds me that having this many cats is a whole lot work and expense. But beyond that, I spend a lot of time feeling guilty because I worry that everyone is not getting enough of my attention. If I’m playing with the Leprechauns, the BBs and the MBs are being neglected. Oh yes, they try to join in the games but the Leprechauns are just too big and the little ones get trampled. If I exile the Leprechauns while I play with the others, then I feel bad for them. And even with the BBs and the MBs I feel like sometimes I’m paying too much attention to a couple kittens over all the rest. And poor Fin is getting the shortest shift since he’s the biggest. I make an effort each and every day (not that I mind!) to pick up and cuddle every kitten in the house. I seek out all the older cats and spend some time loving on them. They are the ones who get the least amount of my time, because, well, the kittens are just so darn cute!
So when I find a good home for one of my babies, I tell myself that they will be the center of attention most or all of the time. They won’t have to share their owners (staff :-) ) with a bunch of other cats and kittens. They’ll be loved even more — if that’s possible — by their new family than they are with me. On the rare occasions I’ve placed a kitten with another breeder I’ve tried to place them with people who see their cats as pets first and breeding animals second.
So when the day comes that a kitten leaves, I focus on the joy the new owner is feeling. It’s easier when someone picks up their kitten in person — I get to witness their happiness first hand. My last sight of the kitten is one of him or her being carried by his thrilled new owner to a happy forever home. It’s harder when I ship a kitten, because my last glimpse is of him in a carrier heading off to the unknown, crying because he doesn’t want to be in there. And I cry, too. I anxiously await the phone call from his new mom and dad saying he’s arrived safe and sound — and that they are in love with the little fur ball.
There are always kittens that just kill you to give up. If/when Keegan leaves, I’m going to be especially sad as she’s been doing her best to crawl into my heart and convince me she should stay. There have been others that were incredibly hard to let go, too. But you just have to say goodbye. You can’t keep them all. Repeat after me, you can’t keep them all. (Or repeat after Ken, “there’s too darn many cats in the house!”)
And that maybe is what motivates me most of all — a knowledge that when I started breeding cats I wasn’t breeding so I could have 100s of cats living in my home. I love the breed, I love my cats, and I want to share that love with others. I am not a responsible breeder if I don’t place my kittens in loving homes. I need to know — realistically — how many cats I can care for and rarely or never exceed that. And by care for, I mean provide food, shelter, clean conditions, regular veterinary care, and, of course, attention and love. If I can’t do that, I should give this hobby up because I’m not doing what is best for the cats. And that’s what matters most.